Lilly Sway

Today I signed-in one of my children late for school because we had to make a run to the doctor’s office. The doctor had no open appointments, so we waited to be worked in. My child had a bad sinus infection accompanied by a high fever over the weekend. We were given a prescription to fight off the infection and sent on our way. After seeing the doctor my child opted to finish the day at school so that the homework would not collect and become a burden. (I wish that my first child had that outlook, as he spent many a night completing backed up homework.) My daughter has a very strong natural will; to succeed at most anything, if she is challenged by anything or anyone. (Thank goodness she has that, I can handle that attitude.) I called the doctor’s office repeatedly for the duration of the morning, hoping to get in. They receptionist finally answered and informed me that we had only 15 minutes to get to the office sign the roster to have a standby appointment. I felt like I had just won a radio calling contest. (The small victories in life are the best) Traffic that early was interesting; where the road wasn’t congested, minivans blazed forth at obscene speeds. We managed to make it and after waiting to be called all morning we had really worked up an appetite. On our way to my daughter’s school, we passed up a McDonalds and she asked if we could please get something. As I turned into the parking lot we noticed the drive-through lunch line had already backed up. My daughter said: “mom, you park and I’ll go in”. That was fine with me, so I offered her some money. She said that she knew we would stop somewhere for lunch and that she had her own money. I parked where I could keep my eye on her and she only had one person in front of her. No sooner than turned the car off, she was on her way back out. While she was walking, I noticed that she was loaded down with at least six happy meals and my chicken sandwich. “Are you hungry or just planning to feed an army?” I asked jokingly. She said: “Some of the people that I go to school with don’t get to eat.” I asked her to explain that to me. My daughter then proceeded to enlighten me as to why some of her peers don’t get to eat. She said that “times are tough and both parents work.” She explained that most parents leave before their kids get up and are long gone even hours after their kids get out of school. She went on to say that some of her friends live in households with only one parent and it’s common for their children to go without food until payday. I interrupted and said that we are in a nice neighborhood and that I was sure that there is food in most everyone’s homes; she said “want to bet” and proceeded to list the names of the children who she knows with a parent that works two jobs and are barely able to pay the utilities after the rent. Those household’s grocery budgets were already taxed when the price of gasoline went up and now they eat a whole lot of tuna and other canned goods. You can only eat so much tuna before you get sick of the taste. Not to mention the overwhelming quantities of mercury in tuna. She said that when her friends get sick of tuna, (literally) they switch to peanut butter without jelly (because of the price) for weeks. She said: “I love that you make my lunch from time to time but if I don’t take charge of making lunches everyday I wouldn’t get to feed the people who are really hungry”. I gasped and asked: “So you mean that you are always feeding other people, everyday?” She said: “yes and they love you mom because you are the only one that has not complained about it to the other parents. Mom, I just thought you knew because you always say only in giving is there receiving”. She went on to say: “I guess that I‘m already fortunate enough to have something so basic to share with people who really do need it”. My daughter works hard for her money. She cleans around the house and makes the lunches for our family. She waters all of our plants and rakes the leaves in neighbor’s yards. Those too elderly to afford the extra cost of having the leaves cleaned off their roofs. She charges five dollars and that always insures a callback for future work or chores. I dropped her off to the middle school and thought of how generous my daughter had become and how much she had grown up morally. I had to stop at the grocers to get a few more things that I had forgotten. While I was there I stocked up on extra lunch-meats. I know that times are hard for a lot of people and around here everything is always done on a budget. My daughter was right; as basic a thing as food is, people just take it for granted and believe that everyone manages just fine. I thought that, yes there are plenty of charities around, but if they are not reaching the right people, then a few extra groceries would be our contribution to our communities well being. How many times have you taken for granted that your children are fine with what you send in their lunchbox, if you send one at all? The meals for our young ones matter a whole lot and I personally pack my children’s lunch and have instructed them to pack their own when I’m working. The lunch line at the school is long, the food is not so great, and sometimes I would frankly like to show them what is really good for children and appetizing. Yes, the schools have lunch programs and the children who take advantage of them are forced to swallow their pride everyday and live through the hellish remarks from their piers and the embarrassing moments of getting through the free meal program. Think of how easily children can be swayed to do wild things. I know that the most disturbing thing that one of my daughter’s friends does to eat lunch is run around the tables and grab pieces of other children s’ lunches and laugh it off as a joke. When my daughter asked him why he did this, he said that it was a long week end and that there was no food in his house so if he acted like a fool no one would know that he was really starving to death. Most of us don’t think twice about our children s day at school much less someone else’s child, but I urge you to learn what is going on there. Did you know that most schools implement the practice of waiting to start eating until the first person in their class comes out of the line? Some times the children have to wait 15 minutes to even take a drink of water. Spend a day off with your child at school and then if you have the misfortune to see a child who is eating as if they are starving maybe they really are and you very well may care enough to help out by putting some money in their lunch account or having a cookout and inviting them over for a hearty meal. I know that there are some of you who feel that lack of food is their problem and that not getting involved is the best course of action. It’s fine to feel that way, no one is going to blame you or point the finger at you, but if you find yourself on the other side of the fence, and it is you who needs help, well I have come to find that what goes around comes around.

Food for the Mind

Lilly Sway