Lilly Sway

It is amazing to me how the old notion that infers (what goes around come around) just really applies to most anything we do. My neighbor was married for the 2nd time since his wife passed away, He had a six month marriage that went south when her family came for Christmas and some of them did not leave, so irreconcilable differences and he was single for 3 months. not very long, Loneliness can be a terrible thing.

Yes I did say not for long didn’t I ? He married an old friend of his from his home town she moved in they renovated their home and were very happy until here lately. When his first wife was in her last stages of cancer he had grown inpatient with the constant care she required I should say indifference to her period once when I was feeding her some chicken broth He on his way out to a party sat by her bed and said it will soon be over patted her on the head and turned to me and said I won’t be home tonight I have met someone and I will be away for the weekend My daughter will come and take over but she has a  dental appointment on Saturday could you please step in for her she will only be gone for about an Hour or two. I said sure I would He said thanks and left.

My friend was a very good person I felt sad that day she was gravely ill, she was not deaf though so when he left  her tears rolled out and then she ate her broth and fell asleep. When she passed away I distanced myself from the morning coffee my husband and I would share with him and I then just waved and avoided the mail box run just so that the frigidness would seep in towards him the indifference to his well being.

He and his wife number three have traveled quite a bit this last year, he use to say that traveling was his least favorite thing to do even when his first Mrs. would ask he would say in front of everyone how much he hated to be asked to do what he hates. Maybe he changed we all do from time to time don’t we? He was diagnosed with cancer a couple of months ago and has been under going chemotherapy for melanoma and while undergoing those test and treatments they found he has inoperable lung cancer so he has 3 months to get his affairs in order.

Having said that, I was over there giving him some chicken broth the other night, his wife needed to do groceries and asked if I could help out I said sure I can,  she was put out because the chemo had left him very weak and the bathroom run for him was out of the question so adult diapers had been out of the question until his health worsened. He sat there with me and said “I heard her say she was fed up with all this mess”. I told him that she was just over wrought. and that he shouldn’t take it to heart  he laughed “I guess I’m having my just desert’s I guess I could have been a hell of a lot more considerate when my first one was in the suffering state like I am now”.

I said that if she were here in the position of insuring that he was being taken care of properly  and had to do what has to be done, she in my opinion would have to take a break and go get groceries and just get some Solis for herself too, He just chuckled. I sat there with him while he slept and remembered all of the back yard bar-b-ques’ the good and the bad ones that our families shared and I truly felt sad for him. The times go by and some are forgotten and some just die off when people pass away.  I choose to remember the good ones more often.

Food For The Mind

Lilly Sway        www.lillysway.com